Rocks are Jerks - 5 Pack Bundle

$49.95

🍁 Ships from Canada

A bundle of five emotionally questionable rocks, grouped together for better value, better shipping efficiency, and possibly improved mineral behaviour.

Final rock selection may vary unless specific choices are requested.

Not Ready for Full Geological Commitment?

Maybe you are only emotionally prepared for a single passive-aggressive mineral companion. That is understandable.

You can still adopt one tiny slab of attitude and let it judge you individually.

Adopt a Single Rock

Choose your five problem minerals

Pick five rocks from the list, or choose Custom saying and enter your own tiny geological insult below. Custom sayings are included at no extra charge because every rock already insists on being difficult in its own special way.

We reserve the right to refuse hateful, discriminatory, copyrighted, or otherwise legally radioactive requests.

Rock 1

Rock 2

Rock 3

Rock 4

Rock 5

Custom saying boxes appear only for rocks set to Custom saying. Please keep custom sayings to 60 characters or fewer. Tiny rocks have tiny attention spans.

If one choice is unavailable

Polished River Stones. Permanent Attitude Problems.

Real polished river stones printed with durable, tactile messages from the ancient mineral world. Every specimen is unique in shape, colour, weight, and level of emotional damage.

Real Stone UV Relief Printed Every Rock Unique Tiny Emotional Damage

Excavation Crate Edition — Coming Soon

Future boxed editions will arrive in miniature dig-site crates with protective filler and specimen cards. Check back when the archaeologists return from the dig.